A Cup of Coaching

A daily pick-me-up of coaching to get your energy flowing forward. 

Monday
Mar222010

Growth (part 2)

As the seed takes hold in the crack of the sidewalk, the growth creates momentum.  But without nutrients--food and water--the sprouted seed dies.  Similarly, if we do not feed the newly created momentum that arises from facing a challenge, we too can wither and die.  Nurturing our growing minds, fostering expansion, and preventing stagnation encourages us to keep learning from our experiences.  In life, we either grow or die, but metaphorically, we can say the same thing about our minds.  Growth is as important to our minds as it is to a living organism, and without proper attention and feeding, we will wither and die in the form of boredom, inertia and lethargy.  How will you feed your growing and expanding mind today?

Sunday
Mar212010

Challenge & growth

From challenge blooms growth.  Just as a seed may struggle to sprout and take root in the crack of a sidewalk, we may struggle with challenges that seem to block us from blossoming.  But every challenge that we meet helps us to grow.  Regardless of whether we conquer the challenge or not, by facing it, we disarm it.  In this way we reduce its power, releasing the energy that may be blocking us, and we are able to address the challenge in a space of empowerment, rather than in powerlessness.  For this week, what would it be like to look at all our experiences and challenges as opportunities for growth?

Friday
Mar192010

Compassion

Cultivating compassion in our lives doesn't require a lot of meditation, rumination, studying of cultures or spiritual texts.  Sometimes all it takes is simply putting ourselves in someone else's shoes.  Before we react, we can choose to take a moment, imagine what it would be like to be in the position of the other, and then respond with mindfulness and compassion.  Compassion is different than empathy or sympathy, in that it seeks to relieve suffering, and is not just an emotional response to a person's situation.  So, for example, whereas you might relate sympathetically to someone by saying, "I know how you feel, I've been there too;" to compassionately respond would be to add, "How can I help you feel better about this?"  This weekend, before you react to someone, try putting yourselves in their shoes, and respond according to what your heart tells you. 

Wednesday
Mar172010

Expectation

We all have expectations.  We expect that we will get paid for the jobs we do.  We expect that people around us will obey traffic laws.  We expect that our friends will stand by us and our relationships will progress in a certain way.  But what happens when something we expect doesn't materialize?  In the case of traffic laws, people could get hurt or even killed.  But when an expectation of a friend or lover doesn't pan out, the hurt is internal, and the relationship itself could die.  Expectations by nature are internal.  When verbalized and communicated, an expectation becomes a shared agreement between two people or within a community.  Traffic laws could be viewed as an agreement that we all share with each other.  If we communicate with our partners what we want, then the internal expectation becomes an external agreement (or not).  Agreements can be negotiated, but expectations that are never put on the table  aren't negotiable because only one party knows about them.  And if it's a non-negotiable one-sided agreement, how can that be fair to the other?  Communicating our expectations now can prevent disappointment and frustration later. 

Tuesday
Mar162010

Choices

Every action or non-action we take is a choice.  Even when we feel like we have no choice, we in fact are exercising our free will by moving (or not moving) in a certain direction.  In looking at life as a series of choices, we come to realize that we in fact have been the creator of our story, but we don't have to be bound by it.  For the only choice we need to attend is the one before us, in the present, not the one we made yesterday or the one we must make tomorrow.  We make our choices based on our realities at the moment, with the resources we have before us, and with the resolve that whatever decision we make, we have made it to the best of our ability at that time.  To this end, there are no good choices or bad choices, only choices.  This keeps us free of judgment and criticism, and able to continue to move forward with positive energy.